Friday June 28 2014
DIARY OF A SUPPOSED-TO-BE-BALLING-AFRIKAN-GIRL
Dear Afrikan Girl,
We all know that words from a wise man or woman are like a secret stash of gourmet food in the heart of a war!
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| As if we haven't studied this book several times... SMH |
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We hang on to every word!
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| Picture this in the heart of a war... |
No, No, No... Those words are not an excerpt from the brainy dramatic quotes in Chinua Achebe's African Series, or from the Proverbs Chapters in the Bible!
This is just how I felt earlier today when the world's smartest quiet man, aka my father, said these three words to me...
'You Are very creative'!
Yes, some of you went ''So? What's the big deal'?
And you are right...but my sisters, you would not understand! You don't know what my journey has been, but allow me to explain! Grab your glass of palm wine, and listen this story!
My dad is a quiet man. You could be in the room with us for a long time, and NEVER hear him speak.
The only times he opens his mouth, some thing really funny comes out, or something really smart, said in the most dramatic sparsity of words that you can imagine...
***
He acts as if words are gold, (which they are) , but the point is he is quiet and doesn't throw out compliments every given minute like my mother or myself. . . not that he doesn't feel the same feelings we do, he just doesn't go around saying around saying everything on his mind like we do. (Opposites attract right? Yeah, that pretty much explains my mother and father.)
But the point is,
It wasn't just the words! it was his face, his voice... everything about the delivery was just... impactful
and my heart fluttered like a butterfly!
Its hard for even a wordsmith like myself to explain the emotion accurately for it seems as though words would only cheapen it...
However, if it were a color, it would be the brightest shade of yellow! If it were an animal, it would be a hyper puppy...
But first...
Let me tell you how it all started!
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Making that Tiwa- Davido decision last night was not an easy one, but my late grandfather always told me when I was a child that the sunshine always came after the rain... not that he owns that quote. He was only paraphrasing a famous quote that all of us know only too well...
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When I woke up that morning, I was all alone in my bed. That's obvious because it was 11.30am and J was already at work... he works so hard, you have to admire him, (J is my hunk).
You want to see a pic? CLICK HERE.
I could barely remember my dream, if any. I just remember being so tired, because I was awake all night trying to add some content to this blog.
I had only gone to sleep at 8AM, and big eyes like mine loved to be closed when possible. Yes, the word is called sleep, but I 'd rather say shut eye, it sounds fancier!
But today was going to be an exciting day! My parents were coming back from Brazil, and we were heading to Dublin next! on a ROAD TRIP!!
(CALIFORNIA has a Dublin... people! Geography) that's for those of you who were about to cry, for fear that I would drive to Dublin, Ireland. I know I only have 10 bucks, but it ain't that bad. lol.
As usual, I rolled over to my side to check out my IPhone, and realized that besides the usual missed calls and texts that I am used to getting daily, there were two missed calls from my dad. My dad hates when you miss his call, FYI, and he only has a Cameroonian number so calling him back when its on roaming is a little tricky. Only the SMS seem to go through (blame it on MTN.)
But either ways, I texted back, and got no response from him! Facebook was my next stop, and as I perused through my profile, one major thing caught my eye, and it was that my homeboy, Fosho just released a new song, which I will share with you here...
I listened to the song when I showered, and hummed it, as I waltzed past my bathroom door to the living room to put some kidney beans to the boil. My parents would be hungry when they got here, and I wanted to have some food ready for them, by the time they arrived.
Before I could go any further with my cooking, his call came in again. This time, I picked it up.
My dad has a stern voice, which lets you know he is a dad- your dad; but it also has a dot of humor; case in point, my father is one of the funniest quiet men you will ever meet...
But this story is not about him. Our phone conversation went like this:
ME: ''Hello''?
DAD: ''Where are you''
INGRAM Alert*: [Long time ago, I would be on an okada, rushing home and trying to sound calm whole lying that I'm in the bathroom] (Read story here)
But luckily I'm an adult now!
Today, my answer was ' I'm home.', to which he replied
'Good, we are outside'.
In a nanosecond, I did a fairly poor job of putting on some clothes, turning up the fire and dashing out of my apartment, to the side gate where I greeted my parents jovially, and helped them carry my pink luggage that they had 'borrowed to go to Brazil...MOSTLY my mum, to be fair.
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| Buy here |
While my parents told me of their beautiful adventures in Brazil, including what it was like to sit there
and watch our country be defeated in both Manaus and Brasilia,
I cooked them a beautiful pot of beans and vegetables (Learn how)
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| Does any one remember this? Read my commentary here. |
MOVING ON from that National Embarrassment!
My dad wouldn't stop walking into the kitchen, to check on my progress.
''Aha when is food going to be ready na''? He asked impatiently.
''I am almost done o'' I replied, smiling to myself and thinking how my father never comes to the kitchen unless he is starving... (It may be an African man thing).
***
In the back ground, I could see and hear and hear my mum packing food for my aunt in Kentucky. She does this funny thing where she talks as she is packing, and you are supposed to answer every single thing she says.
So she goes like this ' So I will give this one to aunty Y, so let's see, yes fish... two packs... aha garri. Ah no she didn't ask for garri, Sandy take this garri'...
' Thank you mummy'.
'Do you want it'?
'Yes mummy'.
''When I come back we shall make small packs for your friends''.
''Yes mummy''.
'' Okay. Good. I'm thirsty. Can I please have some water to drink'?
''There is water in the fridge mummy''.
''Ah! No! I want something with color''.
I gave her a puzzled look, and she quickly added '' Okay you can get iced tea. I am on slim course.''
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| When In doubt, please choose water. |
As I prepared to leave for the store, my mum explained how she was going to stop eating meat when she got back, and go on a serious slim course. I shrugged off the old slogan thinking to myself how carnivorous my mom is! She can't even eat anything without meat, but instead, I said, 'Okay. That's nice'.
Moments later, I was at the 7/11 with my father where we bought a pack of canned Coke's and a bottle of iced tea.
My dad and I have had this coke fight for years, and no matter how much I plead with him to stop drinking Coke, his reply to me is the simple sad truth that 'man must die from one thing'.
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| I say No to COKE! |
When we got back home, I quickly served them some of the rice, beans and miondo that I had made.
While they ate more of the rice, I had some of the miondo which my mother had brought for me from Cameroon (amongst other things in the three bags lol)
As we ate, my father randomly looked at me and said these words.
'You are very creative'
At first, I thought he was referring to that fact that I had added vegetables like broccoli to the beans stew, to replace the meat craving, but the persistent glow in his eyes told me otherwise.
Smiling from ear to ear, he continued
' I was reading your book on the flight back...'
BUY BOOK HERE
I looked up expectantly, as he struggled to find the words to express his joy.
' You really have a gift' He said.
''I am very impressed''.
' Half the time, I had to stop for a moment, to remember it was your book... that you actually wrote this.'
As he continued to find the words, my heart melted like butter, and I
couldn't take it any more. My father's approval to me, is like one of the things that I live for, and in that moment, I just smiled, completely dumb founded and at a loss for words.
Its not often that I am unable to speak, but this was definitely one of those moments, and this little girl returned.
My honest, emotional 'thank you' almost got chocked by the miondo that was already going down my throat.
*Miondo is a little hard to chew and swallow in the first place.
So yeah, that was how it happened, and that single moment validated every single tear, heartbreak, struggle, hard work, pain that I had ever felt! Parents don't know how much their appreciation of our work can make us feel, especially our fathers.. African fathers.
AFTERMATH
Hours later, my wonderful Uncle C finally showed up to pick us up! To beat the traffic, we decided to stay indoors and talk a little more. I offered him him a drink and we argued over several topics, mostly including the indiscipline of the Lions and our world cup fever, our late grandpa, my deceased brother and other fun family stuff.
The city of Dublin, is some 29 miles away from Tracy and one hour out from San Jose where my book signing was the next day.
When we arrived home, a big dinner was awaiting us!!!
The End!
LESSON LEARNT:
Let your work speak for itself.
It may take time, but it always
comes through if you do
only
your best...
That being said,
I love you all...
#12 Bonus: Share this post *
Dear Afrikan Girl, If you Liked this article, please SHARE it with a good friend, an African sistah or some one who might appreciate it. Its almost 7am! I am still awake still last night o!!!
If you don't share it, don't forget
That being said,
I don go me o!!!
Happy Happy!!!!
Love you all!
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Souba!
Yours Sincerely, Stay Authentik!
See You Soon...
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| Read Why I lost this look HERE |
